Saturday, March 10, 2007

O Captain! My Captain!

O captain! my captain! our fearful trip is done;
The ship has weathered every rack, the prize we sought is won;
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the stead keel, the vessel grim and daring.

Marvel Comics was always more subversive than D.C. They had to be. How else do you battle the combined power of Superman and truth, justice and the American way with anything BUT improvised explosive devices?

Killing Captain America with an IED would have been too much though. Having him gunned down on the steps of the courthouse by a sniper hired by an ex-girlfriend is just so much more… American.

O captain! my captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up! for you the flag is flung, for you the bugle trills:
For you bouquets and ribboned wreaths, for you the shores a-crowding:
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning.

But let’s be clear. Just like it wasn’t the bi-planes that killed Kong, ‘twas Bush and Cheney killed the Captain. ‘twas the pundits pulled the trigger and, if the Captain now morphs into the Christ, gleefully grabbed the pieces of silver. ‘twas the neo-cons standing watch on the deck who told the Captain, “Iceberg? Why, that’s not an iceberg! Don’t worry. Just stay the course due East into the setting sun.”

My captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still;
My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will.
The ship is anchored safe and sound, its voyage closed and done:
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won!

Dick Cheney, the evil twin of the Energizer Bunny, the guy whose heart, as Dennis Miller said before his head injury, “has more skips than Richards Simmons on his way to a Ricky Martin concert,” leans down and tells the corpse of America it was all worth it. Look at all these successes.

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